Your Power Is Not In The Push, It's In Your Presence

Ever caught yourself rushing through life, driving aggressively through traffic, gulping down coffee between tasks, or working until exhaustion—only to wonder why success still feels elusive? This powerful exploration of gentleness reveals why high-intensity living might actually be sabotaging your results.

Gentleness is widely misunderstood, especially among high achievers. Far from being weak or passive, it's an energy that creates precision and presence—allowing us to co-create with life rather than fighting against it. Think of spring's natural growth process: seeds don't need micromanagement to bloom. Similarly, your goals don't require your constant anxiety and forceful pushing to manifest.

The hustle culture myth has damaged our relationship with success. Working with top professionals daily, I witness the painful paradox of burnout coupled with underperformance. Two of my most successful mentors—people who have achieved extraordinary wealth, impact, and life satisfaction—reject the "sleep 3 hours and outwork everyone" mentality. Instead, they understand that alignment trumps intensity every time. Your authentic power state isn't found in pushing harder but in trusting deeper, knowing your worth, and taking intentional action from a centered place.

When you feel resistance to slowing down, ask yourself: "When in my work or life am I still trying to control instead of trust? What would it look like to shift from force to flow here?" Remember, you were never meant to bulldoze your way into your purpose. Your power isn't in the push—it's in your presence. And when you learn to be gentle with life, life becomes gentle with you.

Ready to transform your approach? Visit www.lisajeffs.com and apply for a test drive consult where we'll identify your challenges, clarify your vision, and create a personalized plan to move forward with purpose and peace.

Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to Gentleness for High Achievers
• 1:13 What Gentleness Is and Isn't
• 5:13 Breaking The Hustle Mentality Myth
• 8:58 Trusting Without Being Passive
• 12:43 Finding Your Authentic Power State
• 16:11 Shifting From Force To Flow
• 19:15 Episode Closing and Call to Action

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

We're going to talk about gentleness today, and why this is such an important topic for high achievers, top performers, is because gentleness is often seen as weak or passive, when really what gentleness is is an energy that allows us to get very precise with where we are going and allows for a much more present, enjoyable experience getting there. Stick around, leaders, you're going to want to hear this uh.

Speaker 2: 0:41

Tap into your inner power. You got this. Now go get it living up to your full potential. Your energy is magnetic. Big dreams believe in it. Wisdom, we seeking it, everything that you're looking for, brought to you by lisa jeffs, the magnetic leader. It's time to soar. Tap into your power of an entrepreneur. Level up. Step it up because Find your purpose. Time to be a magnetic leader.

Speaker 1: 1:13

Welcome to the show leaders. First and foremost, I will say that I am a little under the weather, which is why my voice may sound a little strange today, and you may notice I kind of pause and stop because I may need to sneeze. So let's get into it while I'm feeling pretty good. No sneezes yet. We want to talk about gentleness. This was a channel message that came through for the Magnetic Leadership Accelerator this week and it's perfect for this month which we are in May.

Speaker 1: 1:53

Spring is the perfect time to see and understand that you don't have to micromanage something for it to grow. Micromanage something for it to grow. The seeds have already been planted and you get to enjoy and watch as those seeds bloom into something gorgeous. So let's talk about what gentle is and what gentle isn't. So when we talk about high performers, high achievers, top professionals these are the clients that I work with.

Speaker 1: 2:32

This is the energy that I resonate with very much. There can be an intensity with this, an intensity of thoughts, an intensity of thought patterns, an intensity of taking actions. Even when you're not taking actions, you may feel like you are in an intense energy. Intense energy, and what this does is it often creates more of the same, or it leads to burnout and it leads to us living a very dry, crumbly, always chasing, always striving, always trying to climb the mountain, but never enjoying the peak when we get there. So I want to talk a little bit about what gentleness is. Gentleness is simply a way of being that allows you to be in the present moment, in a state of full trust and surrender, so you stop micromanaging life and you can start co-creating with it. It means having a regulated nervous system. It means being able to do a task and be present with that task, not thinking of all the other tasks. You need to do no-transcript and actually enjoy it, not chugging it down while you're either thinking of work to do or you're doing work.

Speaker 1: 4:39

There's a lot of still in today's world of you know. We have the awareness, we understand burnout, we have this science even, and still there is a lot of emphasis on doing, doing, doing, work, work, work. You got to work harder than X, y, z to get to the goal and there's nothing against hard work. There's a time and place and there can be benefits to that, of course, especially to someone's character. But we've taken it to like the extreme and I work with clients all the time who are sabotaging their growth, who are not hitting the numbers that they want, who are not hitting the outcomes that they desire, and they are working constantly. They are literally burning out. So let's not mistake just being a doing machine going, going, going, not taking any minute for rest or to be present as you on the right path to hit your goals, because they really don't match up, no matter how much BS is still being pumped out in social media and in certain magazines, et cetera.

Speaker 1: 6:16

I've had the blessing, truly, truly a blessing. Something that I really needed was two mentors that came into my life, extremely successful, in fact, some of the most successful people I know, both in monetary means and in life enjoyment and in health, and they do not perpetuate the hustle, hustle, hustle, go, go go mentality. They are very much aligned with. Everything is energy and you can't work out the wrong energy. And it was a blessing to have these mentors come into my life because prior to that, I had fallen into a pattern. Well, I shouldn't even say prior to that, I was always in a pattern of working, overworking and a real intense way of living. However, when I started my business, there were some very popular speakers and coaches that would perpetuate the work harder than everyone else, literally sleep two, three hours a night and all that absolute garbage. And I fell into that pattern for a while Not that I was sleeping two, three hours a night, I was still getting my sleep in. But then I was feeling guilty about it and it was just such absolute nonsense. So when we look at being gentle, it means taking a very intentional. It can be a slower pace, but I don't want you to think that it just means passive or slow, because that's not really what it's about.

Speaker 1: 8:20

Let me give you an example. When I used to drive to work and I used to work on the other side of Toronto in non-rush hour it might take about 25, 30 minutes to get there. In rush hour it could take anywhere from an hour, usually about an hour and a half to two hours plus to get across Toronto and I would be driving when it wasn't bumper to bumper, driving when it wasn't bumper to bumper, like a complete maniac. I would go so fast. It was just absolutely ridiculous how intense I would have to be driving If someone cut me off. Not that I was driving in and out, weaving in and out or anything like that. But I would get frustrated. There was a lot of aggression on the road and it was just not an enjoyable experience. And I did that for years and I would get to work. It didn't. It was a little bit, maybe a year before I really made the decision to stop going to that place.

Speaker 1: 9:37

That was literally eating up about four hours of my time, my day, every day, and I started taking a slower, more intentional, peaceful ride. I would listen to inspirational audio or I would listen to enjoyable music and I would just enjoy the ride. Often I would be in the slow lane and I would just be enjoying myself being present. I wasn't going below the speed limit, I wasn't doing anything wild like that. I was enjoying and being intentional about enjoying my time on the road. And what happened? Did I get there substantially in less time? Did it take me more time? No, of course not. It took me pretty much the same amount of time to get to work, but in a much more enjoyable process. And this is what I am talking about being intentional about how you're doing things, being present and enjoying your experience.

Speaker 1: 10:58

So part of being able to do this one is understanding and really breaking apart the myth that hard, hard force creates the results that you want. So I work with people that are very driven, very passionate about their work, but there's often a force to it. They feel that they have to force things into existence. They have to work really hard until they're tired. They can't end their day just feeling relaxed or good, because then they somehow wasted the day or they didn't do enough. So you must start breaking down the beliefs that lead to you feeling like you have to have this intensity or it's all going to fall apart. And a lot of this work is nervous system work.

Speaker 1: 12:00

A lot of this work is healing patterns that you acquired in growing up in your household or what you saw, and starting to feel safe to slow down and be present. It's also really apparent that people who are constantly go, go, go, go, go often do not want to slow down enough to start feeling there are things that they're avoiding. They don't want to feel certain things, so they keep busy. Their minds are constantly going. Their minds are extremely busy and often they push against slowing down enough because they know that certain things are going to come to the surface and they don't want to deal with them. They don't want to feel them, and staying busy and being really, really intense is a way to block that all out. It's a way for them to feel safe.

Speaker 1: 13:08

So these are patterns we have to acknowledge, that get in the way of us truly being able to surrender, to trust and to enjoy the process. So trusting timing without being passive. So a lot of times we stop ourselves from being in a state of trust and surrender because we think it's somehow passive, that we're not doing anything. And again, this belief is tied to if I want something or if I wanna see a certain result, I have to make it happen. It's all on me, I need to do it. And again, there's little science that shows this is not the case anymore, but people still have a hard time wrapping their mind around this.

Speaker 1: 14:03

And if you go into a place where you understand that everything is energy and everything external is a mirror of everything that you're feeling, that everything of your state of being is mirrored outward, you start to realize it's actually not about doing In particular, it's not about doing in the wrong energy which many of us are walking around in. And I say wrong, wrong, not that there is truly right or wrong. But if you want a certain result and you're in an energy of I don't believe it's going to happen, I believe I have to force it into existence. I need to make everything happen. No one's helping me, it's all on me. Then you're just going to get that mirrored back and people get get into a place of panic. That is not your authentic power state.

Speaker 1: 15:05

Your authentic power state is something that we talk about in the magnetic leadership accelerator. It is being intentional about being in your authentic power state every single day. This is a place of trust. It's a place of knowing. It's a place of being able to enjoy your life, to know that the money's going to be there when you need it, that you are worthy and deserving of rest, of love, of fun, of success, of impact. You don't need to force things that often you're forcing pushes it further away. Okay, being gentle about your work, about your life, it's a practice. It's a practice that I'm putting into place every day.

Speaker 1: 16:10

I'm not always perfect. Sometimes I'm still rushing through let's say, my coffee If I need to. I know something, I'm on a deadline for something, but it's just about switching. You can switch that in the moment, once you realize once you take notice. Oh, you know what? I'm kind of drinking this down. I'm not really enjoying it. Why, what's the fear here? Is the fear I'm going to run out of time? Is there a feeling that I don't deserve to take this time to slow down and ease up because I have all these other things to do?

Speaker 1: 16:48

There's a lot of these really insidious patterns that come in that we don't often think too much about until we stop them and then we can really see, oh my gosh, these patterns were actually stealing from me, stealing peace, stealing fulfillment, joy, purpose, passion and results and results, because I can guarantee that you will not get the same results trying to force something, trying to make something happen, than you will being very intentional about your moment to moment day, enjoying every moment, setting intentions with ease, knowing once you set them it's done, and your job is simply to take aligned actions and make sure that your thought patterns and your energy is focused on what you want and not what you do not want. So I'm going to leave you with a question and I want you to think about this when in my work or life am I still trying to control instead of trust? What would it look like To shift from force To flow here, because you're Never, you've never, been meant to bulldoze your way Into your purpose, into the life and business or career that you're creating. Your power is not in the push, it's in your power is not in the push, it's in your presence. And when you learn to be gentle with life, life becomes gentle with you.

Speaker 1: 18:56

Leaders, thank you for joining me. I appreciate you. If you want to go deeper on this, if you know you need accountability, go to my website, wwwlisajesscom, and apply for a test drive consult. In this consult, we will go through what you're experiencing right now, with your challenges, any kind of issues that keep popping up, and we will talk about where you want to go and you will walk away with a plan. That plan may include working together or it may not. Either is fine, either is going to get you moving, either is going to give you clarity, so you don't continue to loop around in the problem, in the challenge, because, hey, we all have blind spots. So I love you, I appreciate you, thank you for joining me and, as always, let's stay connected.